Thursday, October 22, 2009

Struggling with vocabulary

I don't know what to call what we are doing. What is it when you're still married, but one of you lives and works elsewhere, and not in the military?

What term do I Google when I am wondering if we are doing this right, with the least damage to our lives, our marriage, and our daughter?

How do I find the blogs by other solo-mommies in the same spot? (Or, good lord, are we the only ones doing this? Surely not.)

I consider myself a pretty skilled and creative searcher and I'm not coming up with anything. I'm used to being able to reach out through the keyboard and find some semblance of advice, community, and knowledge, whether it is about bring pregnant, dealing with knitting problems, figuring out what to do with a bunch of fresh hon tsai tai in the CSA box, potty-training a toddler, surveying what grade percentage other professors assign to participation in freshmen English classes, or researching cities we might have ended up living in.

So it is a new and frustrating thing to be stumped. Another new and frustrating thing.

4 comments:

triciadm said...

Here's an interesting article...especially the comments: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-559483/Are-MARRIED-single-mother--high-flying-husband-away-bring-children-alone.html

triciadm said...

And this one: http://www.singlemommyhood.com/2009/02/are-you-flasm/

Mary G said...

There are lots of leads under "long distance marriage".
Having said that, I've done the live and work apart bit from time to time and it can be renewing; even so, it is a bit of a shock when the spouse moves back. Amazing how we move to fill empty niches without even noticing.
(Example. Resentment when he tells you to check the oil in the car because you have been doing it for six months.)

Mary G said...

But then I can get up a good mad about being told to do anything; I hate back seat drivers and I married one. Sigh.